12.8.08

Strange little me

Photo by figlioDiOrfeo

Yesterday, while I was in the initial throes of exchanging information with a new friend I’ve made, she posed an interesting challenge to propel the ‘getting to know each other’ process – Tell me ten facts about yourself that I cannot find in your 'about' page, or that you do not normally tell others about – After taking quick mental stock of what I have told on this blog (a frightful lot), I concluded that it was an easy peasy task. After all, I haven’t even begun to tap the hoard of my odd little quirks for the reading pleasure of the Internet world. The way I view it, I am a mass of charming oddities, a Kilimanjaro of achieved peculiarities and furthermore, I have worked hard to become this problematically, thorny, me. What’s the use of keeping all this (complication) perfection to myself? So I began by telling her that:

1. I wake up everyday at 5:20 to sweep and mop the hardwood floors of my home.
2. I iron everything. The sheets on my beds, the pillowcases, towels, my husband’s silk shorts, my own unmentionables...
3. I love to clean silver, I have a lot of silver in my house, it is all very shiny.
4. By the end of the day, I will have swept and mopped the floors at least three more times. I have a toddler and that should explain everything.

Are you noticing what I did as I sputtered to a halt on number 4? At 40% of my to be completed list, all my Freudian-slipped particulars were about cleaning and/or stuff related to neatness. Hmmm… #5 was to have been how 99% of my son’s toy sets have all their parts intact, because I find it impossible to put away any of his playthings until all their pieces have been accounted for, but I stopped myself just before breaking down about the MIA medieval catapult that’s still the bane of my existence, and wrote this instead:

5. I like to skip rope.
6. I nearly drowned in the sea once (but not twice). ;-)

Again I stopped. I have to admit that I really really wanted #7 to be about how I cannot abide streaky glass which is why my Windex and I are the best of chums, but I held a steady course away from neat freak-o confessions.

7. I was a narration and voice-over artist and I recorded for TV commercials that were run on MTV and CNN Spanish all over Latin America.
8. My father is currently making a political bid for the Presidency of my native country.

Boooring…

At number 9 the straight lines syndrome wanted to sneak in. Anybody whose eyes bug out when they clap their peepers on crooked stuff should recognize this one.

Real number 9:

9. If a frame is hung askew, my internal leveler must see the matter immediately rectified,
lest
I
self
im-
PLODE.

But I held it at bay with a completely unrelated admission.

Alternate number 9:

9. I hate sad endings. I used to pay my friends to first go and watch the movies I wanted to see so that they could tell me if the ending was sad. A positive on the “sad” issue and that put an end to my desire to see the movie. That’s how I can’t claim to have seen “Like Water for Chocolate or Steel Magnolias.” I hate movies where characters I might like, die off.

By the time #10 finally rolled around, I felt positively exhausted with the exercise. More appropriately, I felt bad about hiding my true nature. After all, if somebody wishes to like me, they should do so with the grounding knowledge of my obsessive compulsive self. My personality is firmly anchored to certain cleaning and ordering urges and it is too late to teach me new tricks. There is nothing wrong with that, right? Isn’t everybody a bit like me? Here's how I polished off my ten facts however:

10. I don’t know how to play chess.

What I should have said:

10. Bev: It is best you know this upfront - I'm a little strange.

__________

I want to hear one of your quirks. Tell me.

15 comments:

  1. So, you're saying you should call yourself "obsessive-compulsive gypsy at heart"? Honeybee, you're talking to someone who has to do all her going-to-bed things in exactly the same order all the time, and brush her teeth a certain number of minutes, and staple papers with the staple at a certain angle, and put the cat food dishes on the floor facing a certain way, and have the pie or cake or whatever cut with a razor sharp knife so that the pieces are cut perfectly, with no ragged edges, and, and, and...

    The important thing to know up front is that EVERYBODY is a little strange! And thank God! Way down at the deep, dark, underwater part of the iceberg, we're all of us just as crazy as a shithouse rat. (Uh-oh -- can I say that here? I'll apologize just in case, but I really did mean shithouse.)

    I gave up covering it all up a long time ago. Long live peculiar!

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  2. M- in a million years I would have never guessed these things about you! Do you REALLY do #1 & 2 every day? I am so impressed that anyone gets out of bed at that hour....if I did I would immediately go to a chair and drink a cup of coffee for about an hour before moving again. The thought that you are actually up and mopping is amazing! And ironing? I love ironed pillow cases, somehow they make me sleep better.

    You did not mention what a great cook you are....so I'm mentioning it for you, you are an amazing cook and hostess!

    And I am very intrigued by the news of your father's political run, good luck to him, that is an incredible feat!

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  3. Half-Past Kissin' TimeAugust 12, 2008 at 10:31 PM

    Very interesting. Sad, though, because I will never be able to allow you inside my home; it is FAR from neat, and truth be told, far from clean, too. You would go crazy in here!! Guess I'm coming to your house, instead. Unless, of course, cleaning other people's home is fun to you... (only kidding, of course! you are welcome any time...that you're wearing a blindfold)

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  4. Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.... I can imagine a psychiatrist having a wonderful time with that list.

    [:-)

    But, then, what do I know? I am owned by a cat.

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  5. Hey... I think it's great that you keep your home so tidy. Want to come over and help me get mine in order?

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  6. I pick things up with my feet (like a monkey), so I will be a-ok if I ever lose my arms.

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  7. Even more reasons to love you, my dear.

    Quirky things? About me? I'm not AT ALL quirky, which, in and of itself, seems quirky, no? ;)

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  8. Bev: It doesn't surprise one bit that we are like two peas in a pod about this. I'm a willing acolyte to your quirks. Just like you said. Long Live peculiar!

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  9. 11, or 10c, depending on how you want to count: "I am a really, really good writer."

    I have an iron. Somewhere. I'll go look for it the next time I get up at 5:20 a.m.

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  10. I always feel a little sorry for strange people. I wish everybody could be as normal as I am.

    ;o)

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  11. Number 6, "I nearly drowned in the sea once (but not twice)"...made me smile. It sounds so poetic, written here.

    A quirk of mine? Okay, sure. I don't like to eat in public, as in whilst walking down the street. How does that do?

    Thanks for stopping by my blog. Pleased to meet you, g

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  12. Suzanne: You'd better believe it. Why do you think M married me? Nah, just kidding but he loves it that he's got a wife like me. I'm a June Cleaver wannabe.

    Thank you very much. I'll cook for you anytime.

    Yes. It is pretty amazing and exciting. He would make a great President should he be elected. Consider yourself invited to an inauguration (in theory).

    B: B. B. B.... You could live in a sand dune or a dirt hut and I'll go to you. It is only for my own home that I turn into this dirt exorcist. Anyway, for you my dear, I'll brave anything. ;-)

    Nick! He has! - "But then, what do I know? I am owned by a cat." Exactly! Throw no stones and all that.

    Randall: Trade you a train set for a getting your house in order. I recommend the deal highly. You stand to gain so much...

    Robyn: I use my left hand because I'm convinced that someday I will lose the use of my right hand. Wanna check our DNA? I have some pending matters with you my friend (Colorado trip). Talk to you privately.

    Nona: You are the sweetest thing. I love you too. And I know, I know... you are so Zen that your quirks get ironed out.

    Dave: Flattery will get you a lot with me. Just this once, unless you keep complimenting this nicely (in which case it might be more), I'll iron for you. I make my own starch too! Just kidding.

    Thomas: I don't know how you do it but you've got the knack for hitting my funny bone. I like you just the way you are. You are one of the normalest people I know and I say that in all seriousness.

    Gracia! What a beautiful name. Thanks for visiting. I liked your own blog very very much. You and your partner are so talented. Lovely art you make. I'll keep visiting you and do come back. Milena

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  13. Hi, Just checking in and decided to leave a quick note about our quirks. My best friend died a few years ago and she was riddled with obsessive quirky rituals and to do lists that constantly kept me laughing. Now, I find myself laughing when I notice I am doing those crazy, obsessive things she used to do. I would swear to you that I am calm, cool and collected, but I suspect that when around others, I have tons of actions certain people would describe as odd... hmmmm... who cares?

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  14. i this is a cute and quirkily adorably written list.

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  15. oh and sometimes i find myself counting the steps i take.

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